Why do i fall out of love whenever we are apart. it's like. out of sight out of mind. i feel like shit. why do you like me? i don't treat you well. im a horrible girlfriend. i don't want to leave you because that would hurt you. am i a bad person for staying in a relationship because the other person loves me? am i just feeding off the attention at an attempt to have my ego stroked? but i do love you, where did the feeling go? i think im scared, just all the time, this fear, it transformed. it turned into irritability and indifference. we dont kiss. we want to. i want to kiss you so bad. is that all i want you for? sometimes im scared it is. but you feel like home. what happened, or, i guess, what didnt happen? im bad to you im so so so so utterly BAD WHY DO YOU WANT TO STAY. WHAT DO I PROVIDE. you have more chemistry with your best friend anyways you dont need me you really do not. i dont need you. without you i'd have nobody. i mean i bascially already have nobody even when im with you. we are nobody to each other. i dont even know how you feel about me hugging you all the time. i dont know if you like to be kissed. i havent asked. you havent asked. neither of us have told. maybe i do need you but i dont want you. no. i want you so bad. i want it to work. i want to feel love. i dont crave to be around you when im away, but when im near, i cant get enough. when im near i want to be in your skin, under your skin, coursing through your blood stream,. i wish i was glass. i wish you could see through me. let my desire drip from my skin. let it show. let me know you. i dont know how to make this work. it is working perfectly fine just because of our silence. we are so fucking good at being silent. god you're so beautiful when you're not saying what's REALLY on your mind. i bet i look like a soulless imbecile. why do you love me. am i projecting? why do i love you? do i love you anymore? the fear has overridden the love. i love you so much, i fear us so bad. we are unknowable together. we don't fucking kiss